Coincident

Sometimes, when you are meant to meet somebody, you will meet that someone no matter what. It may be something impossible, and it feels like there is no connection in between two of you when both of you only know each others name. Both of you can just walk pass each other, treating each other like strangers.

However, there can be some coincidence to make both of you meet. It may be just when your friend wanted to hand you something and this someone became the in-between-man; when you are so sad and ran to a friend, suddenly, this friend just introduces you to this someone; or even when this friend is interested in one of your friends, and both of you get to know each other.

There are many possibilities between you and this some1, you may just be friends, close friends or perhaps couple. Sometimes, the progress can be so fast that you will not believe it. Even if you had just been through a really heart-aching relationship, and you thought you are still in the process of recovering, this some1's existence might just bring back a smile on your face, unconsciously.

When you are still thinking that both of you can share a lot of things, understanding each other, and can be a really close friend of yours, you will not realize that some chemical reaction is going on. A slow reaction might really require patience, but since the reaction is already on, there should be a product in the end. So, just enjoy the process of this reaction until a product is ready to be formed.

N97 thief Wanted!

OK, I lost my HP, not a normal 1, N97~ There are many things inside le. T.T Around 100 games on the memory card, more than 1000 photos, and I had not have the chance to save some of them.

Most importantly, ALL MY CONTACTS! I am now entering the contacts 1 by 1 into my new HP, because, I am totally unlucky, my back-up files got corrupted, and only the CONTACTS part is corrupted. What luck am I having now???!!! I seriously want to go through all the CCTV right now and find out who is that idiotic fella. Gonna kick his ass, post his photos all around WWW and chop him into pieces!

Anyway, to all my friends, if you know my number, kindly send me a message telling me who you are so that I can save it again~ ^^ (I am still using the same number~ )

Anyway, just came back from spa and massaging~ FOC again! Haha. Relieve stress~ And my muscle cramped when I was having my massage... Weirdo~ LOL.

P/s: some one told me something, actually, kinda happy de. ^^

The Busy and Complicated Week

Had been really busy recently and slept at 1 or 2 almost everyday. It is normal for most people but not for me, so acne had been popping out, VERY SERIOUS. Those stress and pressure from rushing assignments, pissed off by some people, relationship problem and peers problem really made it more serious.

Ok, cut the crap. Talking about pissing off by people... I just hope that it won't happen again, hey fren, plagiarism is a serious academic offense in our school k? I just hope you all know that. Please do not ever plagiarize, copy everything and still leave the hyperlink there. Smart plagiarizing is still acceptable though detectable by our turn-it-in, not by me~ So, I will not need to do the thing again, since I cannot detect it~ Do not copy from books that I recommended because, come on, I had been reading from there k? I might not have such good memory, but hey, I can at least remember when the whole paragraph looks so familiar. ^^ All in all, be smart, like, copy a line from Wiki, another line from another website. At least, I can detect wiki, not the other sites, then I will need to redo a small part only. Also, a special thanks to them for reminding me about the peer assessment form in which they need to sign and confirm that they did give the same contribution to this report like others did when I am busy rushing the report. (OKAY, I admit that, I am seriously being sarcastic. ^^) I JUST HOPE ALL THESE CRAP WONT HAPPEN AGAIN! Last Chance k? Not being bossy, just, be fair for others.

The very nice peers problem which had been with me all the while. Let's see... Sometimes, I joke with friends, and all these jokes did not really go through my brain. Some of my friends can accept it, 'cos basically, it is a joke. When my friends cannot accept it, it became a serious offense to them. Some might show it, some did not. This friend showed it, and made it so obvious. Ignoring me and not looking at me when I am talking. I am really sorry about that joke and I guess I really need to apologize. Will get myself some courage to really say sorry. Also, I might have back-stabbed this friend, no details on this though. I had consider the consequences of my action when I made that choice, and the friend said it was okay. So... I really do not know. Should I apologize face to face or SMS? T.T

Relationship... Started a new relationship? Not this fast la duh... Just, I do not know if I had put him down 'cos I had really get used to the current situation. It is only that, sometimes, I will still thought of doing something for him. Perhaps, I am still used to being a bf-savior (not that noble though, just hope I can help him with sth)? Anyway, the new issue here is, am I having feelings for some1? Same problem with that some1, is it because of loneliness or really 'cos very comfortable when with him. One thing for sure, we are alike in some ways. Anyway, like jie jie said, ENJOY SINGLE LIFE~ So, think about that later. If really have feelings for each other and really ready to be in a relationship, why not? Just that, I need to be sure that the some1 had really made up his mind and make sure that I am not having super strong feelings for ex. LOL.

And, I just wanna say, I LOVE LATIN! Dancing is FUN! Should really learn earlier when I have the urge to, should not drag til now. Though I might be really an outsider in this, and I still can't master the basics, I am in love with it~ Just need to practice more~

Recovering in process...~ ^^

Finally put everything down... Not to say put down la, just I dun feel sad over it anymore. Will still miss him, since he is still kinda important? Haha. But at least I won't cry lo. Some1 asked me if he is worth missing, I really do not know eh... It's not a problem of worth it or not, its you will or will not. Haha.



Having my real good life now, just being elected as the Vice Pres of PharmNotts, my 1st very important post (Except for the Assistant Head Prefect post during primary school~). I was super extremely nervous before announcing the results. Was like, OMG, what if I did not get elected? Hmmm. I was nominated for 4 posts and forced to choose 1. I wanted to choose President at first but do not really have confidence in getting it so... ^^



Anyway, gonna start busying soon. Events to plan and handle, exam coming soon, working during summer hols, and Travelling during JUNE! I MUST HAVE FUN DURING JUNE! (Hope I can). ^^



Ohya, I went Chiamy's hse to stayover last week! Though I was not really allowed to and I kind of force my way out from the house by asking Jye to fecth me before telling my mum. ^^" I need a friend to talk to at that very moment so... yea... I "ran away" from house. Haha. I was kinda down and nearing the edge of collapsing because I misunderstood him, and I am really sorry. Sorry Mr. C~ T.T Anyway, went out with Chiamy, Chee Yuen (A new friend though I knew who he is since CHS ^^") and his friend for dinner in Jaya One.



Then, Jye msged and asked me for badminton with Nga. So, went badminton in Megah Badminton court at round 9.45pm and played til 11, barefooted... Haha. Chee Yuen joined oso. Had fun and really tq guys, I guess it was your effort for cheering me up. And you all really did. All of them gave me courage to face him on the next day when I went to meet him, to look for truth? Or just to let myself draw a full stop on this relationship? Haha.



Anyway, met him, did what I need to and now, I fully recover d (not fully, perhaps 70%?). Hope he will take care of himself and use that protector. Oh and btw, me and her talk back~ Some of you may know who I am referring to~ ^^

结局里，没有日落，却有祝福。

这一切一切，真的只是习惯而已。就好像一枚戒指戴了好久好久，留了一个痕迹，也习惯了它的存在。忽然，你摘下了，下了好大的决心摘下了。明明在几天前，还好开心地向全世界炫耀，现在却收了起来，感觉上就像发了一场梦。

我真的发了一场梦，不知不觉就一年了，真的很快。梦里面，我爱过，哭过却很少感动过，最最最最感动的一次，是你为了我走了那三公里远的路，那时的你，真的很爱我，对不对？梦里面，我也很幸福的向所有人分享我的幸福，告诉他们，我真的很相信，他就是我要找的人。只是，梦的最后，我还是被你用所有爱在爱着吗？

不久前，才告诉了一个朋友，能找到一个我爱的人和爱我的人，真的不容易，但是我找到了，所以我想和他永远在一起。我们也说过，要一起白着头看日出日落，一起牵着对方的手走，就算是白发斑斑，还是一样。





只是，最美好的话，最浪漫的回忆，只留给了昨天。当不被爱着，再想继续也是徒劳。


今天，回去学校，以为可以看看你，分手前后，都没见过。真的没缘分吧，算准了时间却没见到。看着无似人非的学校，看着空荡荡的手指，看着空荡荡的操场，看着空荡荡的右手，少了温暖的手，哭了。离开时，我笑了，放下你，放开回忆，笑了。

我不像你，我没那么快康复，哭过，并没有那么快好。见到你，会笑？会躲开？还是会像陌生人般，擦身而过就好了？ 应该没机会知道吧。

崔文翰，我爱你，恨你，讨厌你，想念你，但现在，我要谢谢你，也祝福你可以尽快找到专属于你，最最最最向往的幸福。

Bye, I mean, Really goodbye~

So, I guess it's the end. Sophia is now officially single again, and not in a relationship with mun hon.

At first, I really thought that it was a waste, for we had been having feelings for each other since form 4, perhaps form 3, who knows? 4 yrs is not a short time, neither is 1 yr. We wasted 3 yrs waiting for each other and been together for 1 yr 1 month and 3 days. LOL.

Really, it was sweet when I was with him. I still remember the first date on Valentine's day, remember how shy he was when he did not dare to hold my hands, remember our first quarrel on that day too. Although we always need to lie to my parents and dated secretly, we really had spend a lot of quality time together. The first time he hold my hands, first kiss on my forehead and the first kiss on his lips, I will never forget how, where and when.

Fate was quite harsh on us. Dating one month once had already been a habit. (and so, taking photos had been the thing that I won't forget to do.) My mum was kinda against this relationship and my dad did not know. Our relationship had been through a lot of other obstacles too. Fortunately, we managed to get over them.

Breaking up and reconciling had also been something that our friends got used to. I just could not bear to let him leave my life even if I was the one who dumped him. LOL. He was my everything, I will turn to him when I was down, sharing all my problems with him, waking him up in the morning, calling him before sleep, manja-ing with him whenever possible. I love to hear him calling me dear, lao po, bao bei or piggy...

But I guess everything needs to end when things went really wrong.

I do not know what exactly is the trigger point but I guess things gone from bad to worse since the day I felt guilty. Also, after my dad knew about his existence, my dad wanted to meet him. I was being impatient and he was refusing to meet my parents. So, relationship got into trouble by having cold wars frequently early this year. We could quarrel over some tiny matters and not talking to each other had been a daily routine.

We both had wrongs. I tend to compare him with other people which made me really frustrated and tired and desperate. Seeing cousins coming back with bgfs really made me anxious to intro him to my family members. Relatives had also been urging me to bring him home and meet them. When he refused, things really got heated up. Perhaps, it was my fault to make things progress too fast.

Me too, becoming a really normal and demanding girl, had always hoping to receive a Vday present from him which he did not give. I started to become disappointed and thought of him as very not caring and do not understand me. I told him, told him that a card is sufficient. Maybe he did prepared, maybe he did not, who knows? At least I won't know now.

I go to this decision when I realized that his love for me had been different. He used to think that dating me is important and he will go for any dates that I planned. However, since the time he rejected our one month once date, for some really 'cool' reasons (I do not want to say what but some should know), I became really suspicious.

Perhaps KC was right, girls really have good instinct, they can know if the guy still loves them. And now I know, he does not love me as much, neither do I. I can end our phone calls just to chat with friends, and he can refused to chat with me just to play games. I guess, this is really some significant thing to determine if we should continue.

I really like what Jvn Yi told me and was kinda touched 'cos he know me quite well. He said," Sophia, you are very tough but it is just your cover. You will need a guy who is tougher and stronger than you for you to show the real soft side of yours.". Ya, I used to show my soft side when I was with him, but that was when we were in Form 4 and when we first started our relationship. I tend to put up my strong side when I feels that the 1 I was relying on becomes weaker. When you need to make most of the decisions, including breaking up, you can never be the real soft you.

2 persons with 2 totally opposite principle of life (ie. Have enough fun before start working and work and earn enough before start having fun) should not be forced to be together in the first place. Maybe if you thought that you could change your some1, or hoping that some1 will become more matured and less playful for you, I guess, you better do not start a relationship. Some guys will really change if that is what they wanted and they need some motivations from you; some guys will never change no matter how much you gave him. I had been too much of a savior and now, I will live my life for myself.

I will not turn back this time, yea, all my darlings and friends, I will not. Nichelle, remember the 3 times thingy I told you? I used the last chance to reconcile last time, so this time, it's really over. Unless, he turns into some1 I do not know in years, into some1 that I am looking for, whom I will treat as a different person. However, until then, I will not regret on my choice, 'cos I know I made myself the best choice. I will cry, I will miss you, I will still think of the moments together, but it will stop when the mark made by the ring totally disappear. Bye, my first love~ ^^ And who knows? I might meet my Mr. Right soon, maybe soon, maybe when I go UK, maybe when I work. I believe in fate~ So just follow the flow.