Secrets? Random thoughts again. =p

Keeping secrets in the heart hurts ourselves. Sometimes, spilling it out will hurt even more people.

So, some people choose to keep it to themselves and hoping no one will ever know or start a topic related to it.
Some people choose to say it out because they feels that other people deserve to know even if they got hurt.

There is never a perfect solution. There is no right and wrong. No matter how, people will get hurt in the process, be it yourself or other people.

Sometimes, spilling it out, make a secret a problem, but in the end, what you get is a solution. Sometimes, keeping it to yourself enable the secret to be kept forever and no problem will be created, life goes on.

I used to love keeping everything to myself, because, I do not like to create problems for others nor adding burden onto people that I love. I would rather be struggling with all my thoughts, questions and secrets stuck in my mind than sharing with others. Sometimes, people might even not appreciate it when you try to share and you will be really screwed when they complicate the situation rather than solving it. But when you keep all your thoughts to yourselves, you are not showing the people who are important to you the true you. Pretty contradicting...

The most important thing is, when you meet someone who is
worth you showing the real you,
communicating with them in a way you are most comfortable with,
not worry about how your image will be ruined because of the way you behave,
and also,
telling them anything you have in your mind,
knowing that they will understand and even give you the appropriate advice,
you will not be contradicting yourselves anymore. ^^

Btw, just another random post which I do not know what is the main topic I am talking about. =p Well, life is full of randomness, isn't it? <3

我们该分手吗？

女孩终于鼓起勇气对男孩说：“我们分手吧。”
“为什么？”男孩问。
“厌倦了，就不需要理由了。”

一个晚上，男孩只玩线上游戏不说话，女孩心里也越来越凉了。
‘连挽留都不会表达的情人，能给我怎么样的快乐？’
过了很久，男孩终于忍不住问：“怎样做，你才能留下来？”
“回答我一个问题，如果你能达到我心里面想要的答案，我就留下来。”
“要是我非常喜欢悬崖上的一朵花，而你去摘的结果是百分百的死亡，你会不会摘给我？”女孩接着说。
“明天早晨告诉你答案好吗？”
女孩的心顿时灰了下来。

早晨醒来，男孩已经不在，只有一张写满字的纸，压在温热的牛奶杯下。
第一行，女孩的心已经凉透。

“亲爱的，我不会去摘，但请容许我说出不去摘的理由，好吗？
你只会用电脑打字，却总会把程序弄得一塌糊涂，然后对着键盘哭，我要留着手指帮你整理程序。
你出门时总是忘记带钥匙，我要留着双脚跑回来帮你开门。
喜爱旅游的你，在自己的城市也常常迷路，我要留着眼睛为你带路。
每个月‘好朋友’来临时，你总是全身冰凉还肚子疼，我要留着掌心帮你温暖小腹。
你不爱出门，担心你会患上自闭症，我要留着嘴巴驱赶你的寂寞。
你总是爱叮着电脑，眼睛都被糟蹋得不是很好了，我要好好活着，等你老了还能帮你修剪指甲。
我还要帮你拔掉懊恼的白头发，拉着你的手在海边享受美好的阳光，和柔软的沙滩。
我要告诉你，花的颜色就像你青春的脸。
所以，在我不能确定有人比我更爱你之前，我不想去摘那朵花。”

女孩的泪滴在纸上，但她抹干净眼泪，继续往下看。

“亲爱的，如果你已经看完了，而答案还让你满意的话，请你开门吧。
我正站在外面，手里提着你最爱吃的鲜奶面包。”

女孩拉开门，看见他的脸紧张得像个孩子一样，只会把拎着面包的周在他眼前晃。
女孩终于明白，这就是在爱情里或生活里，被平静的幸福包围着时，所透露出的平凡爱意。

100

短短的一百天，能做些什么呢？

也许就跟平常一样，
糊里糊涂的过日子，
或忙碌的努力拚命，

也许在伤心中度过，
或者活在欢笑声中。

我用了一百天的时间，
认识了一个人，
让我。。。
找回了快乐的自己，
做了一些疯狂的事情，
满足了自己很多的欲望，
重新享受爱与被爱的滋味。

一百天的分享，
一百天的倾听，
一百天的关心，
虽然会很短暂，
但已让我爱上。
未来的第几个一百天，
希望只会越来越爱你。

也谢谢你，
还记得
所说过，
做过的，
每一件事情。
爱你也许真的不需要理由。♥

A Memorable Birthday~!

Tadaa~ I am finally 19-year-old, cannot laugh at people saying I am still 18. 1 more year before I turn 20. >< Well, this year, my birthday is really a happy one. I had not been having such happy birthday since the last birthday four years back then when I threw a birthday party at my house.

Perhaps, birthday is not really that important but it is still special, a day when you are born to this world, a day when you start your journey of life. No matter how you live your life, you will not have a chance to if there is no such a day known as YOUR BIRTHDAY. Hmmm, why making it sounds so serious and complicated... >< Anyway, for me, I just have a little wish which is to spend this day with my love ones, and this year, I did it. ^^ My parents, my sisters and my boyfriend.

9th of July:

Had been looking forward to this day and I was not disappointed by even a tiny bit. Baby had planned it well and there is just 3 words to describe it -- SWEET LIKE MAD

Baby and I chosen karaoke to spend our time before dinner. We went to Redbox Gardens for the buffet lunch and seriously had a great time there. Its like almost a month since I went to sing k so yea, we enjoyed ourselves~ ^^ Singing all the songs with baby was just sweet~ =D

Us at Redbox~

And after Singing k, this baby started giving me surprise. The blur blur baby made me believed in his lies and suddenly appear outside the car with 2 big creatures. And OMG, its my CUPIDO and CUPIPI! I seriously never expect him to buy me those because... Refer to one of my post. Seriously, damn touched k? I know I sounded like a little girl loving all these soft toys but they are seriously super cute and I waited for like a year d! What more when they are given to you by your beloved? Cos they represent love~! Thank you baby!!!!!! Will take photo of them after they took their bath~ ^^

Then, we had dinner at Bintang Revolving Restaurant @ Federal Hotel~ Baby gave me 3 choices but in the end I chose a place which is not in the 3 choices. Feel so evil. =p Overall, the food was ok, not to say very nice but still worth it 'cos of the atmosphere and not-bad-view. ^^ Most importantly is, went there with baby~ ^^

Then, we were supposed to go Ampang Look-Out-Point. But, my parents were nagging for going out til very late (it was only 9 plus...) and the traffic was jam like mad. Seriously, stuck in a dunno-what-is-going-on jam for like 15 mins, basically, there were jam in any road we used. So... Gave up since I promised mum to be back by 11. >< Not disappointed though because that was just an extra bonus of the night and I had already seen the night view of KL in the restaurant. ^^

Then, my baby was so busy with messages when he was driving me home. Luckily his driving skills is good enough... LOL! That pig dunno why suddenly looks so emo, so I thought he was just too tired. 4 hours of karaoke session by 2 person only was not easy le. Haha.

Anyway, reached home and had baby to stay at my house til at least 12 am to countdown my birthday. ^^ Audrey was there too cos since last year she will be staying over at my place to countdown with me too. =p When I went upstairs to find my mum, she passed me a present from my aunt. Its a romper~ (I always thought I can never fit into one because of my super weird proportion, like what baby said: 30:70... >< But this 1 was just nice le~ Really thank you! Haha.)

Audrey made me try that romper and that 2 devil (audrey and baby) were busy chatting. I thought they were insulting each other again. LOL! But, after I am done fitting into that romper and wanted to show them, I WAS SHOCKED~ Guess what, they are carrying a cake outside my room and singing Birthday song! Even my mum was part of it. ><"

Seriously, it was really very sweet! To have you love ones planning a surprise for you and feel more sweet after knowing the process of planning. I Love You Mummy, Audrey and Shaun! And baby, you are really crazeeeee in a super good and sweet way!!!!!!! I am really happy to be blur~! It really works because I seriously did not suspect a single thing. ><

Me and baby!!!!! And the cake~ ^^

Me and Audrey!!!!!! Love you my Sis~! Really do not know how u can keep this from me for like a week~!

Ohya, And when I took out my Cupido and Cupipi from their bags, I found something seriously TOUCHING! Something that is a lot better than a birthday card even if its just 2 pieces of paper. It still feel sweet no matter how many time I read it. ^^

10th July: Birthday~

Forced Audrey to say out their plans and sleep at 2 something, near 3 am. @.@ But it was the sweetest night ever I can say. ^^

Went to Sunway Pyramid to watch Twilight: Eclipse with Audrey~ The movie was ok, more to romance and less action, not like what we saw in the trailer. Even the battle was a bit too erm... Fast? Edward is pity in this ep, that's what I felt la. But nvm~ Jacob is handsome~! =p


Then, went to Genting for buffet dinner~! And baby followed us there!!! =p First genting trip with family plus baby! Though not a really great trip, not a really great dinner but then its special. Really very special and again, sweet (I am sorry if I use the word sweet too many times, but then its the truth). ^^ And that is really one of my best birthday present. =p

Baby~!

Me and Family~!

Taiwan and Gathering~

Weeee~ Back from Taiwan and this is the place that I love the most! Super nice o~! Dan Shui Lovers Bridge (Direct translation). Haha.

Took a lot of photos, around 1300 I think? LOL! So I am toooooo lazy to upload all. =p Just post this pic up cos its really a very nice place, will definitely go again just to take photos cos there is no shops there, except restaurants. Also recommended to go there during evening, nicer and all the shops will be opened. LOL! And look, that's my parents~! Muax!

Anyway, ate a lot and here are some food that are really recommended. Haha! I am like a pro in food d. LOL! Joking la, what I ate is not even 10% of the nice food in Taipei. ^^

My NO.1 favourite! Chong Zhua bing, kinda like roti canai but very much nicer than roti canai! Why cant we have it in Msia?????!!!!

Kinda famous I think but the food ok la, just the 2 below are recommended, their famous noodles are not really that nice though~

Prawn Roll~

Black Pepper roasted pork. Super duper nice! Ordered 2 plates~

WEEEEE~ Mr.J's restaurant~ Food not bad but most importantly is, Jay Chou's shop!

Mango ice~ The mango were sweet n the syrup is really made from mango le. Super fresh oso. Nice nice nice!

Oyster Mee Sua~! And its not ordinary mee sua o, its Ah Chung Mee Sua, I guess the most famous mee sua in Taiwan? LOL!

Busy after coming back from Taiwan. Met A-Levels gang on the second day~! Had lunch in White and everyone ordered the same old food... Chicken Rice! What makes it nicer? The memories! ^^

Watched Ip Man with Keen, Cheong n Ian~! Then became a light bulb which was sooooo bright. Luckily that love birds aka Jonathan and Yee went movie after I kacau them for half an hour. Yee got me a bday present too! *Big hugs n flying kisses*

Then, rest for a day and went for my Primary school gathering. As usual, more like an outing or lunch session but it's great to see a different gang every gathering. The constant attendees: Me n Yeh Vin! Many ffk last minute though. Anyway, great to see them!

From left: Xiao Qi, Ive, Me, Takki, Yeh Vin, Ruby and Izzati~

I know right, you might be scratching your head asking... Since when Shaun came from my primary school. =p
Actually baby was just fetching me here and there, accompanying me for this and that~ ^^

T.R.U.T.H

Nobody is perfect and hence you can never find someone who is totally fulfill the criteria of a perfect partner. There is something that you will need to try to accept for you to get something else that you want. Is the thing that you want worth you accepting something that you will not accept? In other words, is the person worth your love?

Maybe, people will say that love is love, there is nothing about worth it or not. Love him and you should not be calculating too much. Love is not a mathematics question, no calculation should be involved, there is nothing about who sacrifice more and hence deserve more love. Its only about TOLERATING and how to make the relationship work in a two-way manners. It is just like crossing a bridge where only one person can go across at a time. If you do not want to tolerate and let the other person cross first, neither of you can cross. The bridge will eventually break due to the pressure and weight, and now, nobody can go through. You may feel that why should you be that noble and be the one who tolerate, but remember, he or she might be tolerating too, it is only you did not realise. Even some small things like letting you choose what you want to have for dinner is a kind of tolerating, though you may think that he or she cannot make up his own mind. This is because they know that there is nothing much they can do to make you happy, and since tolerating you and let you choose they things you like can make you smile, they will do it.

Someone says, Love is Blind. Even you did not accept, but because you love the person, you tend to focus on your love and ignore the other issues that you can neither tolerate or accept. But, in a long term, when both of you gets closer and there is not much fear of losing each other, problems will come. At this moment, I guess what comes into play is not only tolerating, but also RESPECT. Respect each others' choice and decision they made for their life. You can go into their life, but not interrupt their life. You might be important in their life, but you are not the only one present. There are many other parties that they will need to take into account, like friends. And if the person is willing to tolerate, even not until the extend you expected or hope, it is already enough and worth you respecting. What more if their words are kept and what you said are remembered. Moreover, if you already know in the beginning that complaining will not make much difference, why not you try respecting? Respect does not mean support. It is just like two rough surfaces, you know you cannot remove the friction unless you make the surfaces extremely smooth. If making the surface smooth is impossible, why not add a lubricant? It will not remove all the friction, but at least some.

Perhaps, many including me may think that in the beginning of a relationship, everyone can make a lot of promises and tolerate a lot, but this will fade with time. They tend to not remember what they said, expecting you to tolerate and understand. For some, I think is because they really take things for granted since they are immature. There are also some people who knows that there is something that is being built with time, TRUST. They trust each other and know deep down in the heart that they know whatever they are doing, the another half will understand. Sometimes, this may be a good thing, provided they do not take this trust for granted and starting to betray their partner. Time can prove everything, its only whether the truth is the one you wanna see or the one that hurt you to the maximum. But, it is just part of your life and at least, you know the truth. You can know that whether your insecure feelings are merely because you do not have enough confidence in yourself and your partner or really because your partner do not worth your trust.

Everyone hurt a lot of people in their life and everyone is hurt by many people too. Phobia will be developed, heart will have cracks here and there. However, you learned lessons which you can't find on any books. I know this sounds so much like the line we always write in our essays back in primary or secondary school, but yea, you learned something which you will remember for your life because you were once very down but you stood up again. I can only say that your next one will be slightly more lucky because you learned your mistake in the past relationship and hence, will try not to repeat it. Also, you will learn how to look from other people's point of view and try to UNDERSTAND why they have such decision. You will be mad, you will be disappointed, but when you make an effort to understand, you will know that you should not be angry over anything and blame anyone for that because sometimes they do not mean to make the decision or the decision might be the best for them at the moment. (sorry for stealing some1's line~ =P).

Lastly, Love with you HEART. Your heart can feel things that you may not be able to see or hear. Your mind might be affected by the words others say, be it offending or so sweet that melts you, but your heart is always the one who tell you what exactly you feel.

If you still want maths:

Love = Tolerating + Respect + Understanding + Trust + Heart